Last night as I sat sipping a glass of wine, intent on my BBC drama my phone buzzed, flipping it over it was an update from my local news station….
Breaking News: Robin Williams dead…
My heart stopped. It couldn’t be true. Not the funny man I had come to love over the years.
Frantically I searched the internet…finding an article that saddened me even more. He had apparently taken his own life.
I’m sad to say it wasn’t a huge shock. As I fumbled with my phone the thought raced he either did too many drugs and overdosed or it was suicide.
I suppose that those of us who have suffered Major Depressive Disorder know that it’s those like Robin Williams who are hurting the most. Comedy most often comes from our darkest places our deepest insecurities and making others laugh hides our true feelings and insecurities.
I’m beyond saddened that he felt there was no way he could go on living in the world, even after all the joy and laughter he gave to all of us.
I will always remember sitting and watching Hook for the first time. Also I’m fairly sure my first of his movies I had ever seen. He captured my heart as genie in Aladdin. First seeing Dead Poets Society…
Even in my darkest hours you brought a smile to my face and warmed my heart. Without knowing you helped me through my own depression. For that Mr. Williams I am always thankful for what you did.
Rest well I hope you have found the peace you were unable to find.
I’d like to add that if you are feeling depressed or thinking of taking your own life there are other options. Please reach out to help. There are many wonderful suicide help lines as well as local crisis lines in your area. At the top of this post is the national suicide prevention hotline #.