An update of sorts.

First I’d like to apologize to those who’s comments were not moderated in a timely fashion…I have been finding my motivation to do anything very lacking. Please know that I appreciate all comments and feedback.

I’ve given Pristiq just about a month now. I am not a fan. It’s giving me the feelings I had while on the Effexor XR right before I put myself in the hospital.

Unfortunately it’s been a waiting game of my old psychiatrist retiring and not having any available appointments between my med change and her last day. I’m now waiting until early September to see the new psychiatrist.

This led me to make up a list of all the medications and med combos I’ve been on since my teens. Knowing there have been times I’ve forgotten things when asked in an appointment.

So far this is what I’ve been able to recall including some dosages. Keep in mind this is probably from when I was about 15 to now (31).

Prozac (unsure of dosage)
No meds aprox 2-3 years
Paxil (unsure of dosage)
No meds for aprox 3-4 years
Prozac 20mg + Ativan 1mg
Effexor XR 250mg
No meds for aprox a year
Effexor XR 375mg + Ativan 1mg
Lexapro 10mg + Buspar
Lexapro 20mg + Buspar
Lexapro 20mg + hydroxyzine
Lexapro 20mg + Topimax
Lexapro 20mg + Amitriptylin
– valium, propranolol added later to this combo and amitriptylin dropped.
Lexapro + hydroxyzine + Valium
Viibryd 40mg + hydroxyzine + Valium
Zoloft 50mg + hydroxyzine + Valium
Pristiq + hydroxyzine + Valium.

Its a list that makes me feel so discouraged. So many things I’ve tried and have failed. Never really feeling…the way I guess I think I should.

Basically SSRIs are out. As far as I’m concerned so are SNRIs are too since I tend to end up with very suicidal thinking while on them.

I’m hoping a new set of eyes may open up new doors towards finding me something that helps.

I miss having motivation. I miss not having to put on the “happy mask” to go out and face the world.

I miss wanting to live my life.

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2 thoughts on “An update of sorts.

  1. Have you had any discussions with your doctor about Wellbutrin (Bupropion)? It’s saving my life, I’m finally able to start decreasing my Paxil (which I hate hate hate for its side effects).

    >

    • My previous psychiatrist didn’t feel that Wellbutrin would benefit me due to my previous poor results with SSRIs. Paxil was horrible. No emotions. Prozac did nothing. Zoloft made me very suicidal, and lexapro the only one that kinda worked lost it’s effects for me after about 2 years but never helped with my anxiety and had to take other meds with it.

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